Chinese Restaraunt Review: Eat First

I have decided to start a regular feature in which we will rate Chinese Food restaraunts that we eat at. The rating system will consist of a 'Hunan Manor Rating' and a 'Hon's Wok Rating'. The Hunan Manor Rating will rate the overall excellence of the dining experience and the Hon's Wok Rating will rate the value and service. Both will grade on scales of letters. The amount of the word 'Hunan Manor' or 'Hon's Wok' that is spelled out will correspond to the rating. a rating of "H" will be the worst and "Hunan Manor" or "Hon's Wok" are the best. Without further ado, I give you the inaugural review:

Eat First Restaraunt, Washington D.C.

We went here right after attending the Chinese New Year Festival and were very hungry. The restaraunt was not very big but the line was long. There didn't seem to be a lot of waiters either.

Appetizers: I ordered Shanghai Rolls and they were decent. The hot mustard was hot, the duck sauce was fine and the chili sauce was good. And they were pretty inexpensive, probably since they weren't very big. Each spring role was about the size of 3 big toes.

Meal: Egg Foo Young. It was good. The gravy wasn't as thick as I might like it but it was definitely better than average. I also tasted a few bites of Orange Chicken. This was also good. Some restaraunt's Orange Chicken doesn't taste as 'organgey' as other places. This place defintely was on the 'orangey' side.

This was a decent meal. A little pricey but the food was good. It's nice to try new places. But after all that has been said, I will probably never eat here again.

Ratings: "Huna" & "Hon"

Friends 4 Ever

Read this article: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/4152447.stm

It is about a lonely, lost hippo who was found by wildlife rangers in Kenya. He was placed in an enclosure at a wildlife sanctuary in the coastal city of Mombasa and befriended a male tortoise. The pair have become "inseperable" and the tortoise "...behaves like a mother to it".

Here are my thoughts:

1) This sounds like some weak ass Disney movie. I assume eventually some evil guy is gonna kidnap the tortoise to eat it or something and the hippo is going to to have to round up a rag tag bunch of other wildlife sanctuary animals to rescue him. Perhaps the smooth talking cheetah. The old, wise orangutang. The comic relief hyena. I also now realize that I am gonna have to stop saying "This is SO fake" under my breath to all my friends whenever I go to Disney movies from now on.

2) That is quite possibly the most boring mother to have. A 100 year old Tortoise. I'm starting to think that hippo would have befriended a big rock.

3) Look at the picture. The tortoise looks like he has no idea what's going on. Like that old lady in "Batteries not Included" who thought that guy was her son when he actually wasn't; he was just trying to get them out of the house or something so that the construction company could tear it down. I hope the park rangers are keeping watch on this hippo. Or the Tortoise might wake up one morning, penniless.

4) Remember that game 'Hungry, Hungry Hippos'? Was there any strategy to that game? I feel like everybody just hit the button as fast as they could. That is the worst game of all time. Now that I think about it, do they even make board games anymore? I know they still make Monopoly and Jenga and shit, but do they still make those crappy ones? Like I had one where you were supposed to be some Indiana Jones type guy and you had to make it to the top of some mountain or something. And the big gimmick was that there was this big boulder that could come crashing down on you and blow you away. Except it was more like something slightly lighter and less aerodynamic than a ping pong ball that would roll into your plastic adventurer and he might fall over. That game was terrible.

Welcome

This is the first post. Hopefully we will continue to post. Hopefully we will gain more writers. Feel free to criticize. Feel especially free to offer up suggestions for future posts.